Friday, December 31, 2010

A New Year's Message from Review to Be Named

Happy New Year from all of us at Review to Be Named! We continue our best efforts to provide half assed cultural commentary and to expand on a regular basis to meet more of your pop culture needs. In furtherance of this goal, we are expanding our previous slogan “movies and television for the discerning asshole” to “pop culture for the discerning asshole” (a change you will see, along with some streamlining of the web site in the next few days). Additionally, we wanted to give you a rundown of some of the features you can expect to see in the coming months:

-Look out for the return of Sam’s column Taking Off and its examination of television shows in their infancy and how they evolved after their pilots.

-Random Pop Culture Pop Ten List will make its triumphant return on January 15th, and will be appearing every Saturday following that.

-Whose Film Is It Anyway? will continue to appear on Sundays on a biweekly basis, examining issues of film authorship through May.

-Chris’ Comics Corner by one of our new contributors (introduced below) will review new comics releases, examine trends in the industry and offer thoughts on what’s to come every Thursday starting on January 6th.

-My Year In Lists will follow Jordan’s quest through over 168 albums called essential by one of three music experts (including Review To Be Named alum Ashley and new contributor Collin, also introduced below) and will appear every Friday starting January 7th (with an Introduction coming your way momentarily).

You can also expect to continue seeing our movie and television reviews, which we promise will be just as lacking in insight, integrity, and ingenuity as ever. We would also like to welcome to the Review To Be Named family (a construct so dysfunctional it puts your actual family to shame) two new contributors, both of whom were alluded to above. Chris has left his introduction to me, so I will just say that he is an intelligent guy with a knowledge of comics that would put pretty much anyone to shame, and that he hasn’t killed any puppies in over six months. Collin, on the other hand, who will be joining us both as a contributor of one of the three lists that make up my new feature My Year in Lists and as a general music contributor in the coming months, has decided to grace us with an introduction all his own. So here’s Collin:

Dear Innernette,
I compose this introductory invocation to beseech You, most omniscient and omnipotent of beings, to bless this blog in the upcoming new year of twenty-eleven. Exalt Jordan and his never-ending effort. Sanctify Sam and his considerable contribution. Grace this reviewtobenamed with your infinite love and holy spirit. May angels attend this web address’s future. But most of all, grant us our daily memes, our bi-weekly leaks, our monthly hype and buzz cycles, and our viral virility so that we, too, may possess that supernatural connection and cosmic power we so desire, synthesize and sublimate that divine knowledge, and continue to consume prosper in our modern habitat as the most intelligent species on Earth. Oh ya, and consecrate me, Collin, the newest contributor to this cultural collaboration, so that I might put this mind and these fingers to productive work instead of clicking on every LiveJasmin and Fleshlight ad, or pursuing every penis enlargement product your Lordship offers before my eager eyes.
Truly Yours,
Collin

With all of that out of the way, I just want to take a moment to thank any of you who read us regularly and wish you all a happy, prosperous new year filled with all of the personal and pop cultural delights you could ever wish for. May it be a year for the record books.

-Jordan

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