Feature: Random Pop-Culture Top 10 List: Top 10 Leading Sluts in Film and television

by Jordan and Sam

Random Pop Culture Top 10 List is a (fairly self-explanatory) weekly list in which Jordan and Sam take stock of the realm of pop culture, and come up with their Top Ten in a specific category.

Throughout the history of film and television, there have been a good number of characters who, for lack of a better word, were sluts. Some of them we love, some of them we hate, but we can all agree that they have an obsession with sex. Here is our list of the Top 10 Leading Sluts in Film and Television. Feel free to add, subtract, rearrange, or bang your way right through the list:

10. Zac and Cody, The Suite Life of Zac and Cody and The Suite Life on Deck

Sure the Disney power twins haven't had sex on the show (that we know of) but in terms of tween programming, these two sluts are by far the most consumed by the beckoning call of their nether-regions. That vomiting feeling you get when seeing or reading about "The Suite Life" is perfectly natural as these two have spent years trying to get with girls. There is precocious and then there's these two. An early obsession with the ladies is all well and good but the Disney twins are obnoxious and pervy. They are as romantic as that Uncle who gets awfully "touchy" at Christmas after a few eggnogs. They have the same lust for women as the crew on "Entourage". Quite frankly, it is pretty vile that the Disney Channel peddles this on tweens but that's the way the wind is blowing these days. In one episode Zac (or Cody, I can't tell the two apart) asks the other to be his wing-man. Pray for our future.



9. Poison Ivy, Batman

Like Zac and Cody, Ivy's sexual history is a bit shady, but as far as Batman's enemy's go, Ivy probably gets around the most. Sure there's Catwoman but Selina Kyle is really only interested in Bruce Wayne. Ivy uses her pure sex appeal to lure men in to her traps and controls them to do her bidding. If kissing her would kill you, I can't imagine what would happen if someone even tried to have sex with her. So no, Ivy is not a slut in the sense that she sleeps with a lot of guys, but she definitely is promiscuously flirty. The fact that she uses her hot plant attraction to kill her enemies earns her a spot on this list. If only there was a way to introduce her to Zac and Cody.




8. Ally McBeal, Ally McBeal

Ally McBeal followed her high school sweetheart Billy (Gil Bellows) to college, and then to law school. The two then went their separate ways, only to be re-united when they find themselves working at the same law firm. The only downside is that the love of herlifes now married. Ally responds (as any potentially crazy slut might) by sleeping around, both in the office and outside of it. Couple that with her lapses into fantasies that often include licking attractive people in the face, her ridiculously short skirts, and an incredibly overactive biological clock that manifests as a dancing baby and you have one of the bigger sluts ever allowed at a counsel table. For sheer force of charm and by the number, she may be beat by another David E. Kelley creation in James Spader's Allan Shore from Boston Legal, but when push comes to shove, Allan never licked anybody in the face (and his courtroom attire never screamed, "Do me right here!").



7. Nancy Botwin, Weeds

Nancy Botwin's adventures in drug dealing started simply enough as she was struggling to make ends meet after suddenly losing her husband. She would sell weed to teens and adults around her typical suburban California town with the help of her brother-in-law and eventually her kids. Though Nancy quickly realized she could sleep her way to success. Mary Louise Parker can definitely pull off the sexy mom thing but it was not really much of a plot point until season 3. The turn from Nancy being smart business oriented drug dealer quickly turned to smart, slutty, business oriented drug dealer when she realized she could use her sexuality to get her far in the drug trade. Nancy's transformation can be marked back to season's three's "Brick dance".

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qtlElBLg354


6.Barney Stinson, How I Met Your Mother

Many people on this list so far can be called slutty, but few tackle their quest for some ass with as much relish as Barney Stinson (Neil Patrick Harris). Barney has famously bedded over 200 women in his day, many of them with elaborate schemes that range from pretending to be an astronaut to putting on make up and claiming to be himself from the future. In recent seasons, Barney has tried his hand at love, but his devotion to boobs and bimbos always seem to beat out his desire to find someone to actually spend time with. Barney is disgusted by the idea of marriage, but never tires of the endless pursuit of his next conquest, no matter what lengths he has must resort to in order to bed her.



5. Don Draper, Mad Men

What separates Don Draper from many of the other loose folks on this list is that his slutty ways hurt people in his life. The biggest hit obviously comes to his marriage which when last we checked (SPOILER ALERT) is over as far as we can tell. Don has banged quite the menagerie of women in his time, and of course in some weird way it is acceptable. Perhaps it's because the audience knows Don is living a lie or maybe we forgive him because he is a man and we are collectivley sexist and we can just say "It was the early 60's!" but Draper is a total slut. Don's sexual exploits provide us with some actual character depth which is a tribute to the strong writing and performances on the show. The audience is left asking after he fingerbangs yet another beautiful woman, "Who is this man? And who will he fuck next?"



4. Brenda Chenowith, Six Feet Under

Brenda Chenowith (Rachel Griffiths) is introduced having random, anonymous sex in a maintenance closet at an airport. From then on, she cheats on every partner she has throughout the series, often multiple times and in some pretty grotesque situations. Brenda commits sex acts in a department store, the back of a truck, at a key party, and even with two random guys who come biking past her house. In her defense, she does eventually seek treatment for sex addiction, but in ours, not even that stops her rampant infidelity from tearing apart further relationships. Plus, there's that weird tension she has with her brother...




3. Captain Kirk, Star Trek

Captain Kirk has certainly gone where no man has gone before. He is easily the sluttiest man in Star Fleet. He also has to get bonus points for having sex with scores of alien women. The faith he has that they have genitals that would not burn/tear his earthly dick off is inspiring and disturbing. It takes quite the slut to go to the ends of the galaxy just to hook up with some weird green chick. Like a gentleman who appears later on this list, he not only is a slut, but he can kick some ass. So of course he was a hero to a generation of Trekkie nerds. Getting laid and going through space? Clearly this is the dream. Alas he is only the third sluttiest leading slut in film and television. Khaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan!!!!




2. James Bond, Dr. No et al.

Is there anyone more synonymous with having a lot of sex than James Bond? If your answer to that question is no, you should realize he's only #2 on our list, but nevertheless there is no question that 007 gets around. He has at least one, but usually two (and sometimes more) lovers per movie, and with a franchise that has now spanned five decades and 22 installments, that is a whole lot of slutting around. Bond was married once, in On Her Majesty's Secret Service, and tried his hand at monogamy once again in the 2006 reboot Casino Royale, but both efforts ended in tragedy and in an affirmation that for a man as dangerous as James Bond, one night may be all a woman can handle. Any more than that and she may end up shot, drowned, or even encased in gold. James probably doesn't mean to hurt anyone with his promiscuous ways. In fact, he's probably just trying to trying to fuck the hole in his heart where love used to be. Its a big hole to fill, but we're confident he can fill it.



1. The Cast of Sex and the City

When the basic premise of your show (and, hell, even its title) is about four women having as much sex as possible, you're bound to run into some accusations of promiscuity. But the four ladies of Sex and the City wear the term slut as a badge of honor, and live up to the designation with pride. Samantha (Kim Cattrall) may be the most brazen of the group, but her friends have their share of encounters as well over the run of the series. If sex is a metaphor for female empowerment, these ladies must be the most powerful women alive. Running through as many as one man each per episode over the course of six seasons (and now two movies as well) makes it possible that one or more members of the group have had sex with every single man in New York City. That would explain why the sequel had to move them to Abu Dhabi...






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